It has been way to long and I need to journal they tell me!

Well I have decided to start blogging lots more! :) This is more for myself and the girls cases too! I love updating friends and fam and sharing our journey but I will also be using this as a journal for our situation too to have it as record. So if you fallow my blog bare with me there will be a lot more entries now and I may only share some with all or on fb too! :)
I will need to update from the last 3 months because I have not blogged since Jan. which I can't believe how fast time has gone on but there is too much to tell now so I will just have to start on this week for now and do the last 3 months later.
This week is a big one, court, attorney is coming on to our journey here, Sissy has gotten great news, eye doc for Sis, vision teacher has come back and more!!
On Monday we met with our new attorney for the first time, we are going for something called De facto status, it gives Foster Parents who have cared for the children at least 6 months more of a say and can be present in most of court hearings too. It is not as much a birth parents rights but it gives us a bonus and something we feel that is very important for the girls. We are also happy to have someone representing us and what we want to see happen. Right now we are just going for this status so there is more to come on this but I feel good about it all. Homework for now is a log of all medical appointments from the last almost 8 months! That I can do!
Sissy went back to see her local eye doc today and she said everything is looking nice and improving so that is so great to hear. She does want us to still patch the eye on top of drops 1 hour each day, she hates it and it is so hard to get her to do but we will try to continue to do so! This little girl is doing so very well. We also got great news yesterday that she scored NORMAL on her ASQse, yahoo, so amazing to hear, so proud of all of our hard work, hers and ours!! Hats off to her KCkids and teachers too.
Visit with birth Dad, the oh so dreaded visit with the Baby's birth father, something I seriously loathe! I had to report to him and the supervising worker that the Baby had yet another ouchy because she is a toddler and is crazy, so that of course went over well. Told them about her bruise above  her eye brow and how she hit my mirror in our bedroom, then also how the other bruises got there because she has a bit of a temper and likes to throw herself down and hit her head on things when she is mad or doesn't get her way! The birth father who is so weird, just plain weird was too concerned that I had to have her strapped in a stroller for her safety while her sister was getting checked out at the eye doc today! "Why did she have to be in there?" he asks. Oh my, maybe if you were a father in the first place you would understand you can let a toddler run around a very small office with many objects that could hurt her and I as well had to hold onto the 2 year old! I know what he is going to do I see it now, oh this woman cannot not take care of two at one time, I need to get my daughter away from her! Yep to go along with his request for wanting a new foster Mother because the baby calls me Mama too, that was a good one! Then the question I got when I went back to get the baby today was, "when she was stuck in the stroller and could not get out, did she have a toy?" Oh wow buddy, glad I didn't think of that one, thank you oh great one, you are so brilliant! Grrrrrr! I told him why yes she had a snack, my cell phone and my keys to play with, things she loves but at that moment she wanted to scream and throw a huge fit because she could not get out of the stroller and she was slamming her head onto the bar of the stroller cuz she was mad!! Mind you this was a total of 5-10 min that she could not get out, it was not long, she was perfectly fine before that! Ugh! This is what I have to deal with this guy, he is something else man and I know it's only going to get way worse and way more ugly with him, it's going to be a big fight! The Baby has been saying "No, No, No" and shaking her head no the last 2-3 visit we have seen him, she does not like him, not only this but she used to cry every time, every time, it was awful! What I love though is how he tries to kiss and hug her and she will not ever do it to him, she just ignores him, she doesn't say hi or bye or hug or kiss him at all! She says hi and bye to lots of people now and hugs and kisses all the time! She even said bye to the supervisor today but not her own birth father, ya lets say a sign!!
Tomorrow Sissy's teacher comes out and we love her so yay for that, her vision teacher returned after some months and just couldn't believe her progress, said she looked and was doing fantastic.
Friday we have court, oh court gotta love court days too! Lets pray of course again we do not get postponed yet again, it has been so much waiting now for so long of just getting the parents sentenced! We want reduced visits to two times or one time a month on the birth Mom and get Sissy in her assessment for adoption finally, so we can hopefully adopt her in this year still. On the Baby and her birth father we do not want him to get anything positive, we only want still supervised visits and nothing increased or unsupervised and want ti hear they are issuing his services or not and that he has his psychological evaluation coming up very soon! Also that the county got the clear to use his evidence from his juvenile years too! This guy should have never been allowed to even see his daughter, its crazy but it has been allowed! :(

A New year!!!

Welcome 2011!! I am welcoming this new year with major open arms, such a year of big stuff happening and I feel like a new woman too! I feel so truly blessed where our lives are going this year, our adoption of this little gal is just the high light of my life right now. I cannot wait to finalize this chapter and be able to officially call her ours! Although it already feels that way but to be able to give her her new name and our last name, it is just so exciting, I cannot wait until August or September comes! Something I have waited my whole life for our first child!
Along with this adoption my one and only little Sister is finally getting married and I am thrilled to death about this! It looks as though it could take place as well close to our adoption, so the end of Summer will be a busy one at that but oh so exciting! I am so happy for her and excited to get to help her through this time in her life too! Yay!
Our Baby girl, our Foster baby she is still in this waiting status and we are always praying for her and this situation to be ok! I can't fathom if it does not turn out ok for her and us so I just rely on God to get us through this with her, it just has to be ok, she has to stay with us, her sisters and be safe and loved that is just the only way about it! If I think about it too much I just worry myself sick, so I just focus on the good going on and trust it will be ok! Something that has been very hard for me in the past, letting it go!
But there is something that this year is also bringing and that is something I told myself had to happen this year! "The New Me" it is time! I have had a really rough time that last almost 4 years and have not focused on myself, stress and emotional ups and downs have really taken a toll on me and I decided with all of the wonderful changes in my life going on this year, this was it, time for our first child to come into our lives and time for this new Mommy to get fit and healthy! For our daughter, for my husband and specially for me, I am going to do it! I would have to say that my little Sis getting married really made me take the official plunge as well, thanks Sis for getting my butt in gear! :)
I have made some major personal goals and this has been a very hard struggle for me for a long time in my life actually so I know it will not be easy at all but I am determined to do it! I know I can! By the end of the summer I want to be someone new, someone so totally different and confident and I want to say I did it, through hard work, sweat and even tears if I have to, no one said it was easy, right!
So 2011 you are bringing me so much and I am going to do and change so much too, I can't wait, New Year, New Life and New Me!! Yay!

The Holidays

I can't believe how time is just flying by so fast! It has been just about 5 months since our world changed for ever and we received these girls. Some days it feels like a life time that we have had them and some days it feels like it just happened. But all in all these girls have changed so much since we did get them, Sis is 28 months now and baby is 13 mo already, wow! Sis has lost at least 6lbs and is growing like a weed, she is going to be a tall thing let me tell you, she will surely pass us both up! Baby girl has gained 6lbs and is growing so fast as well, so happy but I am still worried about her growth all of the time! Sis is like 90% on the growth charts and Baby like 20%, wow they are so different already. Sis is sweet and loving, loves to please, Baby is feisty as heck and always naughty but loves her Mommy lots so thats ok I will love her back too little fire cracker! :)
The holidays are here, we got through a fantastic Thanksgiving and now it's already Christmas time, crazy! I kept thinking as the months went by Lord please let us have them for the holidays! Our prayers and wishes have come true. To know at this Christmas 2010 that this little gal, Sissy, is going to be with us forever and many, many Christmases to come is just unbelievable. It is so fun to have them here this year, to share them with the family and see the joy in their eyes. I love the new traditions we are starting and what we get to show them too. I have just dreamt of this for so long now, I have to really pinch myself that it is really happening. I loved the holidays when I was a child and it is so fun to see that again in a childs eyes as an adult and a new Mommy. I had spent the last few years yerning for a family so bad and now we have one and I absolutely love this feeling. I am so excited for this Christmas and so excited for 2011, ready to bring in a new year that is bringing us our first daughter and hoping her Sister too, which would be our 2nd daughter as well. I am so thankful for what we have, we are blessed beyond words to have these angels in our lives and the situation we do have. We are still fighting for Baby girl but I really feel inside and have so much faith it is going to be ok.
I think of the day we got them so often and it was all because of the guy up above and a sweet gal at our agency, we will call her an angel, if it wasn't for them we would not have these girls and would not be where we are right now, in pure love and joy!

Answers!!! Bitter Sweet....

Well that was not too long to get some answers I guess after my last blog after all now!
We got some answers and some bitter sweet news to share today. I guess I will start with the bad before the good.
We found out that Baby girl's father is going to be getting services, it came as an utter shock to a lot of us involved in this case even the social workers and reunification worker as well. A lot of us did not want this at all. We are pretty upset and very scared. He will be getting a 6 month time period to do many things to reunify with her and whether he does that will be up to him. Although the odds are against him and many involved do not think he will complete this chance given to him, we are going to be looking to God to pull us and baby girl through this! This is something we so did not want and we going to need strength to get through this 6 months of ups and downs and emotional toll. We will be able to fight and have a voice in a few months and get an attorney as well and believe me we are going to fight for this baby girl, she needs to be with us and her sisters too, no doubt about it! Please pray for our baby girl!
Now the amazing and exciting news we found out is that we are officially moving towards our adoption process with Sissy girl, it is a 100% that we are getting to adopt her. The girls mother is done and will be getting her 120 days and then she is done, we will be coming to a stop after those days on visits with her and starting our 6 month adoption process. When the visits stop we can start calling her by her new name we are going to choose for her too. We should finalize our adoption with her in about 10 months. We are so very excited to have this amazing little blonde, silly, smart, sweet and so very loving little girl in our lives forever! It's a Girl!!! :0)))))

And the wait continues....

Another update on us over here in this house hold with these amazing girlies. It has been a little while since I blogged. Been so vary busy of course, always something going on. I told my husband it often feels like we have twins with the girls being a little over a year a part and now the Baby being onto toddler hood too! We have been having court hearings but everything keeps getting postponed and continued on this or that, it is hard to be in the "waiting" status but it comes with the territory I guess. Most cases like this go through that many, many times before there is actually a finalization in the works, we may be going thru this for some time to come. I am turning to God and his direction to give us strength and to get us through the roller coaster of up and downs with this and the emotions as well. I do feel that in the very end God knows what is best and will bring us through it all.
Now on to the wonderful part of all this, the girls, they are my world and my everything. They are so beautiful and amazing, I love them so very much. They keep surprising us all the time how grown up they are and so fast. The Baby is 1, already, I just can't believe it, such a big 1 year old. She is 20lbs finally, she is in her new forward facing car seat that she got from Grandparents and Auntie for her bday, we love it. She is stopping bottles this week as a matter of fact and is doing wonderful with whole milk in a sippy cup and table foods. She dropped her morning nap and is now just onto an afternoon nap as well. She seems way to tiny to be so grown up already and moving a long to all this so soon but it is normal and time, I kinda wish she would stay a baby for a little while longer but I love that she is growing and thriving. She is walking so fast now, I think she might run soon and she is talking away, every week a new word.  It is so crazy how fast time goes, I cannot believe where she was at 8 months old 4 months ago when we got the girls. This baby girl is going to give us some grey hairs though I know it, she is a little fire cracker as my hubby says all the time, she can through a mean fit and get a little rowdy too, oh man. But we love her and her tiny little feisty self so much!
Sissy girl is awesome, growing too fast too into a little girl not a toddler anymore. She keeps slimming down and getting taller too, she is so cute, so sweet and so very smart. She has changed so much, she talks so much better and keeps on adding to her vocabulary, shocks us with her words all of the time. Her teacher has told me many times that she sees so much improvement so much fast in her than many families she works with, it is a huge compliment for me and us, lets us know what we are doing all this hard work os so paying off. Sissy has counseling now every week with my hubby and I, she has her teacher come out 3 times a month, she is getting glasses very soon and is just doing awesome! I love her hugs, kisses and laughs she gives me a thousand times a day, makes my world so bright! When she says "I love you Mommy" it is the best.
We had a wonderful Thanksgiving, traveled for the first time as a family and for the girls too, it was an experience but so fun as well. I love having them here for the holidays and in our lives and families too, I love spending their birthdays with them and can't wait for Christmas to come and to have that so very special time with them. I love to see the excitement in their eyes and to know we are giving them a life they would not have with their birth parents.
Not sure when I will update next, we have a very busy month and some stuff coming up before the holidays with the girls case, so for now lots of prayers please for us and the girls and I will update as soon as I can.
I am a blessed foster Mommy of two beautiful girls, so glad God has placed them in our hearts and lives! :)

November a month to be Thankful.....

November is the month to think about what you are thankful for! Wow what a great thing to think about and remember at this time last year where we were at. The entire year it took to get a placement like these girls was very tough, the ups and downs we went through! And now look where we are, we just can't believe it! So what am I thankful for this November and this Thanksgiving???? Two wonderful and amazing little angels that came into our lives, that are so beautiful and bring is so much love and joy I can't even explain! I thank God for giving them to us and will never, ever for get this year and this Thanksgiving for sure! I am so grateful and incredibly thankful!
I as well cannot wait till next Sunday, a day for celebration for sure and a weekend of family and friends coming together to celebrate our little Baby Girl's 1st Birthday! I remember when she came to us 8 months old and I thought wow will we get to celebrate her first birthday with her, I only hoped and prayed we would get this day with her! Can't believe how that time flew by, how she is walking and starting to talk and just becoming this little tot and not a baby anymore, although I wish it would slow down I love that she is such a go getter and a smarty and just wants to be so big because she is so tiny in size! This one will not let anything stop her and she is going to be something else! Love our Baby Girl and almost 1 yr old! :))

Birthday photo shoot, Halloween fun and November stuff to come!

Every week brings something new around here, they fly by but yet as we go thru them these girls grow, learn and are part of us more and more! I can't believe how many people tell us that Sissy looks just like me and the baby like my husband, it is so true! They say that happens a lot when you adopt and in our situation we had no idea what and who we would get to adopt, it is so amazing! I can't believe in almost 4 months how much these girls have changed already, Sissy seems like she is 6 months older than when she came to us and the baby needs to stop growing up already, I want her to stay young! :) The baby is walking a lot, hardly crawls anymore and is talking so much, says a new word what seems every few days! Sissy is a sponge, she is soaking it all up and acting more like her Mama Missy every day, yikes! :)
We did another photo shoot last week at the house, birthday shots 1 yr and 2 yr pics, it was so much fun! These girls are so adorable and just plain beautiful to me. I dressed them up in their birthday party outfits, Sissy's from her 2 yr. party a week and a half after we got them and Baby's party to come in a few weeks, they looked adorable. We went out into the orchards with a rocking chair that is actually from my Great Grandmother and took some amazing shots! This time the girls were in great moods! Then we came in and let Baby go to town smashing a birthday cake on the kitchen floor, it was so funny, even Sissy got in on the fun and MESS! :) I cannot wait to see the finished product! I just want to capture these so very special moments in their lives and have these first memories for us as well, so special to me.
This last weekend was Halloween, way fun time with the girls, got to have Halloween/trick or treating fun with my husbands family and our little cousins on that side, we had a monkey(baby cousin 4 mo) and a lion(cousin 16 mo) and our two little kitties, they were all so cute! Sissy practiced her trick or treating that night too, it was great, she just cares about the candy of course "nandy". Then on Halloween we went into town and trick or treated with some of our friends in a neighborhood where we know several families as well, it was so fun, Sissy did great and had a blast! She was a little slow for our 4 year old buddy and her cousins she was with too but we would throw her in the stroller and catch up to the speed treaters, heehee! I loved trick or treating again and all the houses with the fun spooky decorations, what a really fun, fun time and all the memories as a kid coming back!
November brings up several big events, Baby is turning the big 1! I cannot wait for her party and to celebrate this for her, such a big thing in a baby girls life and so honored we get to be apart of this! Cannot wait for the family and few friends to enjoy this with us too! We have a very big trial coming up that should set the tone and pace for the rest of this case and how it should go, some anxiety for sure over this is going on but I have faith things will be ok, just need it to get here already! And then we get to go on our first big family trip to my Dad's for Thanksgiving! We are heading off for about 5 days and I cannot wait for the little vacation, taking the girls to see my family and all the fun I know we will have, very special too! I have longed for so many of these special times we are going through with these girls!
My husband and I have been talking over little things that dawn on us from week to week with these girlies and realizing that they are 15 months apart, there will be some very close and busy times with them only being about a year apart in most everything! Aghhhh! haha Ya a little nerve racking to think about, life will be crazy thats for sure, my hubby swears we are done already, LOL! 2 girls is enough for me he claims, haha! :) We will see dear I say! :) I may need a boy to off set the girl drama!